Chillin
La Palma, Chalatenango, El Salvador
March 8, 2003
A Cut Above Near Jonesville, Virginia, USA
Sunday July 15, 2001
Y'know those moments when it feels like the world has stopped spinning and the laws of nature have been suspended? You just float in this unbelievable situation wondering what will happen next. I once had that feeling while interviewing a mother I suspected had killed her little boy (she was arrested the next day.) I had another just last week.
I was visiting my mom in Virginia. I left with her friend to visit a man named Kenny. Mom lives in the middle of nowhere. Kenny lives about three miles from the middle of nowhere. Kenny met us as we pulled into his driveway. He could be the living logo of Southwest Virginia. Big guy, mountain accent, mullet, neon Nascar muscle shirt. You've seen or heard of the type.
After the hellos and introduction, we follow Kenny into his toolshed just off his driveway. It's probably six feet by ten feet. Kenny immediately jams a piece of wood into the doors to bar them shut. This is when nature's acid trip began. Vera was seated in the large chair in the middle of the toolshed. Kenny picked up a sharp pair of scissors. And began to cut her hair!!! Kenny is a certified practicing beautician.
I sat in the "waiting area," a couple of chairs behind the door and watched in amazement, reveling in the strangeness. You know how the magazines in hair salons are usually Redbook and Entertainment Weekly? At Kenny's you read Field and Stream or the Cabella's catalog. At one point, Kenny even suggested to Vera a new cut he's seen that he thought looked "real nice."
Then it was my turn and it was like any other haircut I've had, except that Kenny inhaled a cigarette for about each inch of hair he removed. In the small toolshed, that was a little bothersome. He actually did a really good job... and the price... five dollars! Six with a tip. And I should add, I called it a "toolshed" because that's probably what it was. Kenny's remodeled it into quite a nice salon. No chain saws or motor oil to be seen.
But before I let myself think of Kenny as an amusing anomaly, I started thinking that he's really perfectly normal... such as normal is. It's kinda like that quote I stuck in a few entries down. There are crazy, bizarre things about everybody... it's just that one of Kenny's is right there in his toolshed for you to see... if you need a good haircut. Too bad Charles Kuralt didn't live to meet Kenny. |